Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Where do I start?

Several months after I had my son, I said I wasn't sure how often I'd post. I think I was secretly hoping that I'd post a little more often than I have. It's been quite a year. All of the cliche sayings about having a baby are totally true:

"Cherish every moment because the first year flies."
"Before you know it, he'll be one."
"It's the most amazing thing you'll ever experience."

My son turns one on Valentine's Day. :) He already upholds his birth day. He's a little lover and has been my family's own Cupid; aiding in the reconciliation of many relationships. Having him in my life has already taught me so much - and has changed my perspective about so many things. It's possible, but I'd say pretty darn hard to be completely selfish with a child. Everything, and I mean e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g is seen under microscopes and through binoculars to make sure your child's current situation and future is his their best interest. I can already tell it's going to be so, so hard to watch him make mistakes and eventually become 100% independent of me. But at the same time, his accomplishments and adventures in life are going to be some of my greatest moments on this Earth.

Right now, I'm contemplating a few different directions I want to take with my life since my son's first birthday is fast approaching. I have a feeling this year is going to be very adventurous for myself.

So, no, I'm not going to say anything about porn. No life lessons to be learned today. Just an update to let you know I'm here and I want to be here, posting I mean. I plan to continue to post. A goal for this year is to post (however frequent or infrequent) without worry and without fear. God once again showed me recently that He didn't allow me to have a past to be shoved in a closet. He wants it shared. NOT for me. NOT because I have some guilt complex. (which seems totally backwards to me anyway...if I really had a guilt complex, would I be posting about topics related to my worst mistakes just so I could get the inevitable comments that are horrible, hurtful, and rude?) Anyway...................................................No, I will continue to be here and continue to post. And possibly do other things. Because I should. Because other people, as few as there may be, should hear something that could possibly affect their lives in a positive way.